Forgiveness is one of those words, and the act several people turn away from because of the meaning they give it. Often people equate forgiveness with weakness, and it is widely believed that if you forgive someone, you’re condoning or excusing their behavior. People have always made such a bogey of forgiveness because they have been under the erroneous impression that to forgive a person means that you have to compel yourself to like the offender, or it means that you approve of their behavior. Instead, forgiveness is a form of mental self-care that we need to practice if we want to experience peace of mind. Forgiveness, simply defined, is the letting go of blame or resentment toward anybody who has hurt, offended, or slighted you in the past. It means being at peace when things don’t go the way we want. However, it is very hard to give a generalized definition to forgiveness because everyone has a different understanding of what it actually means to forgive. The best we could say is that a person’s belief of what it really means to forgive comes from them.
Acceptance, on the other hand, is quite different from the standard concept of forgiveness. Before you can achieve forgiveness, it is necessary to accept what happened and move out of judgment about it. Acceptance clearly means you are ready to accept the past as an immutable incident and, at the same time, gear up with a strong motive toward a better life together. Don’t get me wrong- Acceptance in the real sense does not mean that you have to forget the event; neither does it mean you completely overcome the pain being inflicted on you. Instead, it helps us to deal with any emotional feelings attached to the occurrence, including the hurt, the mistrust, the betrayed, and any other emotions you might be dealing with. Furthermore, it’s a way of reopening your heart to your offender or partner, and that you’re ready to LET GO of the past, and you want to go on with your relationship. The real idea of acceptance is base on the fact that the past has happened, and there is nothing you could do to change it. Acceptance is a process, and it typically takes much time before we can say we accept the affair. The truth is it is easier said than done, but the need to accept each other mistakes is to keep the relationship alive and growing.
The Art of forgiveness and Acceptance- Why should you choose to forgive?
One of the questions you would want to ask yourself is that “why should you forgive or what are the benefits of forgiving or accepting?” Don’t worry. Here are five(5) good reasons why you should forgive people that hurt you badly:
– Forgiveness is a Key to Self-Empowerment of the Highest Order. Forgiveness is a self- empowering act of the highest order. And one of the great ways to improve YOU is to learn the art of true forgiveness. It is not something you do to let someone “off the hook,” but a decision you make to free up your mind in order to experience peace of mind. Think of acceptance and forgiveness as a change in your life that brings peace, happiness, emotional and spiritual healing. Practicing the art of forgiveness and acceptance will help you to heal the wounds of the past profoundly.
A friend of mine once told me that “Don’t go to bed with a grouch either alongside you or within you” How true this is. That’s quite a number of hours to be holding a grudge, right? We must get rid of any grudges we have against our friends and family before going to bed. This will not only help us have peace of mind, but it will also enable us to keep our relationship alive again.
-Forgiveness is about you and not about the perpetrator. Most people think forgiveness is about the perpetrator or offender, but the truth is, forgiveness is about the injured. The main focus of forgiveness is to help the offender to experience peace of mind by letting go of the past so that he or she can move on in life without having to conserve the pain of the trauma continuously. Most time, if we refuse to forgive others, it’s like trying to drive your automobile with the brakes on. Because you are condemning yourself to be stuck, and this will only penetrate and poison every area of one’s life.
-Forgiveness improves your health and well-being. Several studies have shown that unforgiving hearts are prone to suffer an increased risk of anxiety, stress, depression, hatred, anger, sadness, jealousy, etc. On the other hand, true forgiveness will cause a decrease in the risks mentioned above. When we forgive, we surrender the burden of hurts and resentment that so easily weigh us down and keep us from living a full and joyful life. In a nutshell, a forgiving soul benefits from enhanced fitness in all spheres – physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual.
– Forgiveness will make you feel stronger.
In contrary to the popular misconception of what forgiveness means, some people believe that only the weak practice the art of forgiveness and acceptance, but the truth is that only the strong can forgive and accept. This is because courage is needed to genuinely confront the emotional pain and sufferings, to embrace the perpetrator, and let go of the incident. I know it’s not easy, and this is the reason why most people seek for vengeance instead of going through the process of forgiveness. So, only the strong can accord forgiveness.
Take these five reasons to learn how to completely forgive those that mistreat your emotion in one way or the other, and I believe you will look at each circumstance you face in life with a new, improved disposition. It will help you to recover from any emotional and mental losses, and at the same time, preserve your health. Above all, love is the only transformational force in the universe so, love yourself and forgive those that hurt you. By doing this, you will be happier. I promise you!